Remembering David Carsel


David Carsel was such a good person.  Not only did he do his job well, he was concerned about other staff members if they had problems and went out of his way to provide help and support.  I am proud to say I hired him in 2007 - what a good decision!!  I enjoyed working with him when I was Executive Director and now as a Board Member.  It will be difficult to go into the office and not see his smiling face.  His death is a great loss to all of us affiliated with CAP and of course to his partner and family.

Maryjane Link

David, when I think of you, I smile, because I know you’re at peace. I will miss your jokes and silly office pranks. I can still hear your loud laugh when I walk through the office. We are truly blessed to have known such an amazing man. You are my hero! You never hesitated to jump in and help regardless of the situation. You have touched so many lives with your selfless acts of kindness. Rest in peace, my friend, because you have definitely made the world a better place.

Veronica Black

I will truly miss David. I learned so much from him that I will never forget, and I will be eternally grateful for it. For example, he was always so detailed-oriented and taught me an appreciation for how to present the organization at events and in office. I also had the pleasure of working with him to contact and maintain donors, a skill that is helpful as I pursue my master's in social work and continued career in the nonprofit world. I still can't believe he is gone, but he’ll never be forgotten.

Xerius "Ny" Lewis


I came into the office today, it was the first time that I have been here since we lost David. Naturally I couldn’t remember the code to enter the door, so I reached for my phone to call…David of course. My breath caught when I realized that he wasn’t going to be there to answer and save the day this time.

I rounded the corner towards the office, after someone else let me in and I could see over the partitions that his office door was open, I smiled as my breath caught again realizing it wasn’t him that was sitting in there. He would have come out and picked on me for not knowing the code AGAIN! He would have checked out my attire, which of course was not up to par, and that would be ok. He would remind me of “that one time I looked nice.” We would all laugh and I would be reminded of how much I needed more of David in my life since I wasn’t in the office with him as much as I would have liked. You see, the thing is I always knew that he wasn’t just picking on my attire thinking I needed to look better, he liked me and accepted me for me. We would laugh and make light, but really he just wanted everything and everyone to look its best – to feel their best. Around David was a safe place, a place to feel his warmth and take in his smile and feel at home and safe and welcome no matter what, even to my kids, even when they were in trouble!

I hope that he knows how special that was, and I hope that he knows how thankful I am to have known him, even if I didn’t remember to send a Thank you in response to him sending me the report I needed TODAY, right before he left us. That’s just the kind of gentleman he was, always lending a hand, with a smile and encouraging word, asking nothing in return.

I don’t know who is going to pick out the paint colors of my new antique home now, that he was looking forward to seeing. But I do know that he will find a way to let me know when I have found the right one, and I do know that from him I have learned to slow down to appreciate the aesthetics more, and from now on when I do that, I will think of you, David.

Toni Marrocco-Helwig

Loyal, compassionate, genuine, and fun – these are words that come to heart when thinking of how David touched my life. David also touched my son's life and heart with his kindness. On November 11, 2019 at the Finger Lakes Gaming & Racetrack 2019 12th Annual Charity Cup, David let my son give the jockey a trophy for winning the race, an exciting moment my son will never forget. David also gave my son a pre-cut wooden horse for my son to decorate and keep as a remembrance of his fun day at the racetrack.

Stacie Dailey

David Carsel, CAP's Finance and HR Operational Manager, passed away suddenly on Thursday, July 16, 2020. He was a light and a joy, a steady presence behind the scenes at Children Awaiting Parents, keeping us all going. This time, we at CAP are speaking in our own words, about a man we admired so much.

In October 2018, I had the pleasure of beginning a new position and met the agency finance officer/office manager/historian. David was a man of many talents, passions and his dedication to CAP was second to none. David ran the office like a well-oiled machine, never missing a beat when it came to events, organization, and even the plants. His love for CAP was immediately evident and it was clear this was his family!

David took on many tasks and completed them with grace and perfection. He made certain all events were being done with high standards and his humor kept us going many days. David’s little jokes were often the highlight of our day. My favorite was when he would say he was going to run a CAP special – 2 kids for the price of one family fee. David cared about everyone at CAP and it gave the family feeling to even us newcomers. Our group texts well after the work day was over were a welcome and comical way to manage the challenges.

David soon became my go-to and I counted on him to manage the finances and to work with me daily. Losing David at this time, just as he began his countdown to retirement, is one of the hardest losses for CAP staff and friends. I will always remember his commitment, his fun, and his ever present assistance. To say we feel lost without him is the best way to conclude my expression of gratitude and sadness. David will be forever in our hearts as a CAP icon!

Lauri McKnight

One of the things I will miss about David is his love and appreciation for beauty, and his work to make things "just so." Whether it was CAP's table set-ups for community and gala events, or just remembering to water the office plants, one could always count on David to make things beautiful and right.

Amy Blum

Although I didn't really know David very well, we bonded over our love of cats. I remember many conversations talking about our cats as if they were our children. I will never forget his constant caring and belief in the CAP mission. His integrity, attention to detail and compassion for both the staff and the families of CAP will definitely be missed.

Laurie Poole

David was a wonderful and genuine soul. I will always cherish the time I got to spend with him talking about figure skating, cooking recipes, and sharing laughs over the little things in life. Though It was brief, I’m so grateful for the time I had with David – I will never forget his smile, warmth and laughter.

Jackie Rugg

When I started as a volunteer at CAP a few years ago, I realized that David was the continuity and backbone of the organization that kept it running. So many of us worked hard and cared deeply like he did, but we all went back to him to find out …How do we get this done around here? …What’s the history behind this decision? …Does this get our intentions across the way we want? …Does this look right? I couldn’t imagine him ever retiring – how would we get along without him? And now we have to, so abruptly.

I hear his laugh, I see him dashing out to show me how to do something or rummaging in his files to come up with exactly the piece of information I need, with a smile and a “Ta-dah!” I even want to show him this post, for him to improve it…and then I remember that I can’t.

David’s main work goal was to find homes for kids, period. Everything else was a means to that end. But he cleared the way so that the rest of the team could make that happen without worrying about a million little details of the organization. And he did it so kindly and unobtrusively that it looked effortless. I will miss him so much.

Margaret Hackert-Kroot


I think David had an innate sense of finances, so that he understood not only complicated day-to-day operations, but the institutional history of the organization as well as the players within the organization. I thought that was mixed with a dose of empathy and compassion for the staff and for all the people who were involved in making an adoption happen. On a day to day basis he worked endless hours and was willing to work on any project that needed to be done. David was creative and fun and many of the donors and board members loved him, which is always a good thing. I think in essence he was an operational man with the vision that allowed him to be Chief Financial Officer. David was in fact unique, and that was a blessing to us all.

Barbara Baer